Lemons & life. June 11, 2010.

“If life doesn't give you sugar and water your lemonade going to suck!!!” – Facebook group

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It’s true that everyone has good times and bad times, but we’d have to be blind not to notice that trials and tribulations aren’t handed out evenly. Some people seem to have nothing but pain in their lives, while other people seem to have more than their share of pleasure.

One person may be born into an abusive family and then move from one abusive partner to another throughout their adulthood. Through no fault of their own (especially in this economy), people are losing their jobs, savings, health care and homes. Sometimes entire families are hit with major health problems and no way to pay for them. Lots of people do everything right and still their worlds come crashing down around them. Not surprisingly, they get depressed. Some of them get suicidal.

Then there’s the others – the ones who seem to turn everything they touch into gold. If they need a job, one becomes available in days. They earn enough for luxuries that they take for granted. They enjoy good health and have beautiful children that never get sick. Unless they have a chemical imbalance that causes depression, they’re happy most of the time and see the world as rosy.

Some people believe it’s all a matter of attitude – if you think negatively, negative things happen, and if you think positively, positive things occur. I don’t believe it’s that simple. I’ve seen too many optimistic people get sick or go broke. And no one can ever convince me that an 8-year-old leukemia victim (or incest victim) brought that misfortune upon herself. By the same token, I don’t believe happiness or depression is simply a matter of perception. You can have a good or bad attitude, true, but sadness and happiness ARE affected by our outer environment, no matter how much you may wish otherwise.

So how can you be happy? Well, at this time in your life, it may not be possible. You may be reeling from a recent sexual assault, your spouse may be cheating, you may have lost your job and be unable to pay the bills. You may have legitimate things to mourn and real problems to solve. So “happiness” isn’t in the cards right now. But survival is. Living is. Choosing to hang on for what you hope will be a better future is. Because today may suck, but there is a tomorrow.